The First Annual Say Hey Awards

So apparently, the cool thing to do on the interblognets around the turn of the calendar year is to look back on the year that was. Thus, we’re proud to present the first annual Say Heys, est. 1959.

The “One Shining Moment” Award for the Best Montage: the new pre-game introduction video at the Warriors games

The 2 Girls, 1 Cup Award for the Most Cringe-Inducing Moment: 756!

The Max Power Award for Best Nickname: Stephen Jackson, aka Captain Jack

The Baron Davis Award for the Best Beard: Baron Davis

The Rod Beck Award for Most Lovable Giants Pitcher: Matt Cain

The Atlee Hammaker/Salomon Torres Award for the Most _____ Giants Pitcher: Barry Zito (Runner-up, somehow: Trent Dilfer)

The Teri Schiavo Award for the Most Overexposed Vegetable: Barry Bonds

The Bay Area Did Not Win A Professional Sporting Contest In October

Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please. After this past summer of painful baseball at Pac Bell and the Coliseum, we really didn’t think it could get worse.

We were wrong.

During the month of October, not one sports team in the 415 or 510 area code won a single game. (And November ain’t off to such a hot start either.)

• A’s: n/a
• Giants: n/a
• Warriors: 0-3.
• 49ers: 0-4.
• Raiders: 0-4.
• For the heck of it, we’ll even toss in Cal football: 0-3.

Conclusion: it’s time for the San Francisco Rumble and the ABA. That, or hockey.

An Open Letter To The Warriors

We’re not sure if anyone’s still here, but hopefully you’ve dialed into the RSS feed and are back, like us.

Dearest Golden State Warriors,

We love you. Really, we do. Since the dark days of Terry Teagle, we’ve been by your side, and truth be told, we’re probably never going to hop off the bandwagon.

But please don’t fuck up this year.

The Bay Area just wouldn’t be able to take it. You see, we’ve had quite a bit of suffering since you saw us last spring. When you got bounced from the playoffs in April—we’re sick of the Jazz too, by the way—the Bay Area sports scene was a totally different beast. The Giants were struggling a bit in the early going, but everyone thought it would just be a matter of time before Barry Zito got back on track and Barry Bonds broke the record. We had no idea how painful the baseball season would turn out.

Scottie Pippen To Play Again … In Finland. The Country.

We know that this isn’t exactly related to the Bay Area, but since we A) are in a Euro basketball mood and B) love all things Finnish, we couldn’t resist: 41-year-old Scottie Pippen is going to play professionally for Finland’s Helsinki-based ToPo team:

Former Chicago Bulls player Scottie Pippen is close to signing a two match deal with Finland’s Torpan Pojat (ToPo), the team said on Thursday.

The plan is that Pippen, a six-time NBA champion and now 41 years old, would play in ToPo in December or January.

“We are discussing details now, such as when and in which matches he will play,” ToPo’s general manager Aleksi Valavuori said.

“He would be the best player ever to have played in Europe.”

He declined to reveal how much Pippen would be paid for the two matches, but said it was not a six-figure amount in euros.

Geez, Scottie, not even making six-figures? If the photo above is any indication—which it clearly must be—at least the 6’9″ black man will totally fit in there.

Warriors’ Nation Sheds A Single Tear: Sarunas Jasikevicius Is No Longer A Warrior

It’s official: the Warriors will place Sarunas Jasikevicius on waivers after agreeing on a buyout with the backup point guard. It’s a shame, because Sarunas never really fit in with the team and seemed like a swell former Communist.

In the end, despite the Warriors’ dire need for a backup point guard, Sarunas’ leadership abilities, Sarunas’ shooting touch and his, ahem, undying enthusiasm (read: excellent cheerleading skills), the Lithuanian guard lacked the athleticism (and perhaps the willingness to throw discipline out the window ) to run in Nellie’s system.

Along with the loss of Adonal Foyle, this means that the Warriors have a serious shortage of towel-wavers.

From the moment he arrived in Oakland, Sarunas has been one of our favorite players (both in seriousness and in jest) so as our farewell to Sarunas, here’s Cabbages showcasing his American Idol skill, singing what can only be the Lithuanian version of Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a Prayer.”

What Are The Warriors Doing?

Over the weekend, two items of Warriors news got us thinking.

First came the news that a very unhappy Don Nelson headed back to his home in Hawaii after contract negotiations went absolutely nowhere:

Nelson would like to put pressure on the Warriors to move off their one and only offer. That proposal would increase Nelson’s base salary per season from $3.1 million to $5.1 million, but it inserts a team option for the second and final season, meaning Nelson would face a decrease of $1.1 million in guaranteed money.

Then Sarunas Jasikevicius had this to say about his employers:

“I’m really waiting for [Golden State] to trade me. It’s been going on since February, and nothing’s happening. I really don’t understand this franchise, to be honest with you. I know what kind of offers they got for me, and they’re not taking them. I know they’re not planning on using me, so I really don’t understand what they’re trying to do with me. In that league, absolutely nothing depends on me, so I’m sitting by the phone and waiting.”

We agree with Sarunas: the kid can obviously ball (he’s leading the Euro tourney in assists), he’s a star in international ball, has value around the league and doesn’t fit in the Warriors’ system. He’s not going to play here and has a hefty salary, but the front office won’t deal him?

All this comes on the heels of an offseason that also saw Mully and Co. basically risk pissing off Baron (aka their star/meal-ticket) by denying him an extension, fail to acquire a real backup point guard, get nowhere on contract talks with Monta Ellis and/or Andris Biedrins and finally, give up their leading scorer for Brandan Wright. Individually, all these moves (and non-moves) have understandable–even admirable–rationale, but taken as a whole, things could very well implode in the next couple months.

What happens if Nelson walks away? What happens if Baron sulks and/or gets injured? What happens if Monta and Andris become free agents? What happens if Wright is a flop and J-Rich soars in Charlotte?

Are any of these scenarios that implausible? Not really … the W’s are just rolling the dice.

Baron Davis Is Cheating On Diana Taurasi, Thus Denying The World A Super-Point-Guard Baby

When it comes to athletes blogging, it’s usually hit and miss, not unlike the Giants’ 2007 campaign.

Some athletes’ blogs are unbearably dull (sorry B-Dub; prove us wrong).

Others are a refreshingly interesting look at the trials and tribulations of the season.

Still others are enjoyably whismy.

Now, we don’t pay much attention to the WNBA (sorry), but Diana Taurasi seems to have quite the sense of humor. Writing in good fun, she calls out her buddy Baron Davis on his budding Hollywood relationship with “Desperate Housewife” Teri Hatcher.

Boom Dizzle, you’re breaking my heart!
C’mon. I thought we had something serious. We’re both ballers from SoCal. We kicked it with First Lady Laura Bush at the White House together. We were supposed to have a kid and make her (or him) the best point guard ever – even better than Sue Bird and Magic Johnson put together.
If you’re going to cheat on me, at least keep it in France! Don’t be spotted in at Hollywood hot spots sharing spaghetti!
I’m just playing. Seriously, Baron’s my man. You just better be ready for the season. You’ve got to represent! Be careful. She is Desperate.

This Diana Taurasi is funny! Athletes: they’re just like us!

Oh, and she’s right about the need to represent this upcoming season. After the Giants and A’s disasters, the Niners’ letdown (wait, what?) and the Sharks’ collapse, the Bay just couldn’t handle another disappointment.

You cheatin’ on me, B. Diddy? [Yardbarker]

Who Will Be The Warriors’ Backup Point Guard?

As much as the Bay (not to mention the world) has been drinking the Baron Davis Kool-Aid, there’s no denying that The Beard can be penciled in to miss at least a handful of games every year. As a precautionary move, Don Nelson–or whoever is coaching the Warriors next year–will be sure to limit Baron’s minutes, similar to what Phoenix does with Steve Nash.

Given Baron’s (hopeful) shortage of minutes played and his injury history, the Warriors’ backup point guard situation is as important as ever, particularly if they are going to sniff the playoffs in the ultra-competitive West.

So, who will be the Baron’s understudy?

From the current roster:

• Monta Ellis: For better or and worse, he took the reins last year during B-Diddy’s absence. The thing is, he’s a scorer, not a distributor, and team play often suffered when he forced shots, especially in the playoffs. Monta will answer a ton of questions this year: can he continue to improve after last year’s breakout campaign? Can he learn point guard skills or will he be an Iverson/Arenas-type player? Is he worth signing to a long-term deal? Will he always be a liability on the defensive end?
• Stephen Jackson: Along with Monta, Mike Dunleavy took a turn at the point in the early going, proving Nellie’s fondness for turning forwards into guards. When Monta was all but benched in the playoffs, it was Jax who handled the ball when BD was resting. Jax did a great job of getting everyone involved and keeping the seat warm for Baron. He’s a great short-term fix, but not the answer if Baron goes out for an extended time.
• Sarunas Jasikevicius: If the W’s get stuck with him, why not give him a(nother) shot? The team’s best cheerleader has been tearing up the Euro tournament this summer. His destiny seems to be in the Euro Leagues though.
• Marco Belinelli: A mystery. We’re not sure if he has the PG skills yet, but perhaps down the line.

From elsewhere:

A Belinelli Nickname Update, Via Italy

Many of you may remember our search for a nickname for Marco Belinelli earlier this summer. We got a lot of great suggestions and the jury’s still out, so continue to submit those ideas.

In the meantime, we’ve been getting some feedback from real Italian readers, including a plethora of ideas from one Andrea Baggio. Actually, he said that most of ours–and yours–were “ridiculous,” “insulting” and “worst,” though some were OK in his Italian eyes. But, like all constructive criticism, he offered some assistance, in the form of a lot of inspired suggestions. We’re partial to “Confused.”

hi guys,
I’m an italian fan
please listen to me:

I can suggest:
-) CECCHINO” (chek-kee-no). it means “sniper”.
-) IL SANTO – (as IL MAGO for bargnani) it means “the saint”; it reminds something of otherwordly.
-) BELìN – it means “dick” “cock” in Genoa dialect but is smoth to hear. It let imagine something that slips away or better something that squeezes on everywhere.

Ummmmmm …

-) SVAMPITO it means “hare-brained” like he seems.
-) CONFUSED he seams always like that.
-) IL GUARDIANO (because he is a guard); it means”watchman”; maybe it is not the world to recognize him.

Well, Adonal Foyle won’t be able to take that nickname anymore.

-) IL GIUDIZIO it means “the judgement”
-) BELLI CAPELLI it means “nice hear” and we use that to call someone who likes to the peaople likes him.
-) IL DUCA or THE DUKE because his noble figure

Tim Hardaway does not approve of this nickname.

-) OMBRA it means “shadow”. his plays remind a killer who shoots coming from shadows.

Insert OJ Simpson joke here.

-) IL PRINCIPE it means “the prince” but it would be not original.
-) GARISENDA (Bologna has two medieval towers. the big one is Asinelli, the small one is Garisenda)
-) EMILIO (he comes from the county of Emilia, Emily)
-) SONNO it means “sleep” (you can imagine why)
-) IL SONNAMBULO it means someone who walks sleepin

Now, we’re not quite clear on some of these suggestions–particularly Belin, the towers and the “sleep” references at the end–but we do like Il Santo and Cecchino (and Confused obviously).

Anyway, with training camp on the horizon, look for a little more Warriors news around these here parts. And keep the nicknames a-coming.

Marco Belinelli Needs A Nickname [Say Hey]

Adonal Foyle: A Video Appreciation

If you haven’t heard, Adonal Foyle signed with the Orlando Magic today. We originally ran the following “video appreciation” back in April. We feel the least we can do to commemorate Adonal’s storied tenure in the Bay is to resurrect it for a day.

With all this playoff buzz and beard talk, everyone has seemed to forget about Adonal Foyle, probably the truest Warrior of all-time (sorry Ron Ron). He’s a real humanitarian and a great guy all around. As for his basketball prowess, well, he averaged two points this year and is currently mired on the bench. Since he’s not “playing” these days, we scoured the youtubes for the finest Adonal moments of all time. Consider it a reminder of those halcyon lottery days of yesteryear.

The best parts might be Jim Barnett’s matter-of-fact commentary, like “We’ve seen that a couple of times from Adonal this year” and “Well, it looked worse than it actually was.”

Italy V. Latvia: Belinelli And Biedrins Go Head To Head

A pair of the Warriors’ young cornerstones have been tearing up this so-called “Europe” in summer international play. After watching the above footage from the August 12th Italy-Latvia game, here some brief thoughts on the two Euros:

• Andris Biedrins looks like he’s just going to continue to improve with age. He’s going to get stronger and he’s already one of the quicker centers (or big men) in the league. He can get that weird hook shot anytime he wants, but can he make it consistently?
• Biedrins’ hands are amazing. He catches everything everything around the basket and finishes with striking ease. Yeah, striking.
• AB’s dominating the world: 29 and 11 against Turkey.
• Marco Belinelli has no compunctions about tossing up shots. We’re not sure who’s drooling more about the upcoming season: Marco or Nellie’s offense.
• Belinelli might be the our favorite “unexpected dunker.” Other candidates include Reggie Miller, Monta Ellis and Kirk Hinrich.
• Belinelli’s fade-away cannot be stopped. If he can perfect his arsenal of quick-release threes and off-balance fades with regularity, he’ll have a home in the league for a long time.
• Also, it’s good to see Andris is still looking mighty tan.

[Via Golden State of Mind]

Spree Won’t Be Going Yachting On Whatever Body Of Water Is Next To Milwaukee

Perhaps former Warriors guard Latrell Sprewell should have taken that $21-million contract offered to him three years ago. Yesterday his 70-foot yacht was repossessed by the federal government, for failure to keeping up on monthly payments:

Armed with an order from U.S. Magistrate Judge William E. Callahan Jr., a federal marshal seized the $1.5-million, Italian-built vessel in Manitowoc, Wisc., where it sat in storage, Milwaukee’s Journal Sentinel reported. A New York bank is claiming the yacht’s owner, a company run by Sprewell, 36, has defaulted on a mortgage loan.

The boat’s name is “Milwaukee’s Best.” Despite Sprewell’s Milwaukee upbringing, it’s still an odd name for a vessel, particularly since it also describes a crappy beer. He’s clearly not Milwaukee’s best. That honor probably goes to Hank Aaron, Robin Yount or maybe Dan Gadzuric. But whatever.

It’s almost as if Tim Hardaway and Latrell Sprewell are having a contest to see which one of their old-school Warriors jerseys we’re more ashamed to wear. Really should have opted for the Billy Owens one.

Sprewell’s yacht repossessed [Fox Sports]

Baron Davis Does Not Like O.J. Mayo

McDonald’s All-American and prized USC recruit O.J. Mayo hasn’t even played a college game yet, and he’s already garnered quite the reputation for poor sportsmanship and prima donna behavior. It’s one thing to create some controversy on the interwebs, but it might be a little out of line when you piss off an established NBA star and, as it happens, Los Angeles golden child:

Word is pickup basketball at UCLA got heated Monday when Golden State star point guard Baron Davis engaged in some trash-talking with heralded Southern Cal freshman point guard O.J. Mayo. Davis got upset with Mayo after he didn’t respect one of Davis’ calls. Word is Davis, a native of Los Angeles, told Mayo that he doesn’t know who he is other than the fact that he wasn’t from Los Angeles and he also needed to respect a veteran’s call.

People, respect the call! You do not want to get on the bad side of The Beard.

On the other hand, from Bull Durham to Michael Jordan/Kwame Brown, one of our most favorite things ever is when veteran players put cocky young guys in their place. Call it schadenfreude.

Baron: Who’s OJ Mayo? [Denver Post Blog, via The FanHouse]

Who Will Replace Adonal Foyle As The #1 Bench Warmer?

There wasn’t a much more likable player on the Warriors’ roster than Adonal Foyle. Sure, he ate up the entire payroll. Sure, he’ll still make more than anyone else on the team (except for B-Dids) this upcoming year, despite not even being on the team. Sure, he missed countless dunks and whatnot. But my, was he loved.

Anyone went to the Oracle last year heard Warriors fans’ Gladiator-esque chants–nay, demands–for Adonal during the final minutes of a blowout.

Adonal’s entrances and (always subsequent) exits regularly garnered the crowd’s loudest ovations of the night.

So, who will replace Adonal as the fan favorite bench warmer? Who will we turn to for this year’s scrub chants?

The criteria:

• must be likable,
• must be a nice guy,
• must not be good at the game of basketball, thereby earning the least (or one of the least) playing time on the team,
• … but must try hard.

The candidates:

• Sarunas Jasikevicius is the most obvious choice. After all, he and Adonal immortalized themselves alongside Mateen Cleaves, Mark Madsen and Will Ferrell in the “Male Cheerleader Hall of Fame” during last year’s playoff run. Unfortunately, Jasikevicius is a likely candidate to get moved before the season starts, despite the Dubs’ desperate need for a backup point guard. So either he’ll be traded or he’ll get regular playing time.
• Patrick O’Bryant is virtually assured to get minimal playing time, but thus far, he’s shown none of Foyle’s likability. Sure, O’Bryant sucks, but in his flashes (in the NBA, D-League and Summer League), he comes across as lazy and loopy. And weak. Adonal, on the other hand, was always strong like bull.
• He might not make the team, but if he does, Stephane Lasme will probably be the 12th man.
• Since the heyday of Chris Mullin, Warriors fans have been dying to embrace any player that vaguely resembles Mully. And by “vaguely resembles,” we mean “is white like.” Mike Dunleavy, Adam Keefe and Vinny Del Negro didn’t work out. Brian Cardinal was a god dressed in nylon shorts though. Austin Croshere will surely match–if not surpass–Adonal’s legendary effort, and with it, his futility. Croshere might be the odds on favorite.
• There is far too much upside and intrigue surrounding Brandan Wright at this point for him to be considered The Adonal-Deuce, but perhaps if he struggles mightily, he’ll earn a place at the end of Nellie’s bench. Is there any doubt the Oracle wouldn’t go crazy if they see the lanky lefty checking into the game with 45 seconds left of a blowout? Bonus: as we’ve seen with Shawn Bradley, skinny big men are prime targets for posterization. Double bonus: he’s got braces, so that makes him likable. He’s our sleeper!
• If Wright is the sleeper, then Kosta Perovic is the darkhorse. Very little is known about the 7-2, 250-pound Croatian beast of a man, except that he enjoys a good piece of halibut.

Adios Adonal

This morning, we witness the end of an era. The death of an institution, if you will. The conclusion to an award-winning miniseries.

Adonal Foyle is no longer a Golden State Warrior.

With two years and nearly $20 million left on his original five year, $40.6 million contract, the Warriors bought out the remainder of Foyle’s contract, making the iron-handed center a free agent.

Foyle, 32, who has spent his entire 10-year NBA career with Golden State, was a starter in 2005-06 under coach Mike Montgomery, who had talked Foyle into re-signing with the Warriors in 2004. However, Foyle played little for Don Nelson last season, and totaled all of six minutes of playing time in the Warriors’ 11 playoff games. It was the first playoff experience for Foyle, who had played 641 NBA games without reaching the playoffs, the most in the league at the time.

Despite his limited playing time, Foyle was the Warriors’ third-highest paid player last season, behind Baron Davis and Jason Richardson. Foyle averaged 2.2 points and 2.6 rebounds last season, and his best season was 2000-01, when he averaged 5.9 points, 7.0 rebounds and 2.7 blocks.

Interestingly enough, if the Warriors don’t resign restricted free agent Mickael Pietrus, 21-year-old Andris Biedrins will be the Warriors’ longest tenured player.

So, what does this mean for the Warriors? Well, since Adonal never played and they still have to pay him, not much. Adonal was a class act, a really intelligent guy and (probably) a beneficial locker room presence, but that stuff only goes so far when you have a negative impact on the game itself.

If anything, it has a bigger impact on Warriors fans, who will have to find a new favorite bench warmer.

Warriors, Foyle parting ways [SFGate]