The Bay Area Did Not Win A Professional Sporting Contest In October

November 5, 2007

Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please. After this past summer of painful baseball at Pac Bell and the Coliseum, we really didn’t think it could get worse.

We were wrong.

During the month of October, not one sports team in the 415 or 510 area code won a single game. (And November ain’t off to such a hot start either.)

  • A’s: n/a
  • Giants: n/a
  • Warriors: 0-3.
  • 49ers: 0-4.
  • Raiders: 0-4.
  • For the heck of it, we’ll even toss in Cal football: 0-3.

Conclusion: it’s time for the San Francisco Rumble and the ABA. That, or hockey.

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An Open Letter To The Warriors

November 1, 2007

We’re not sure if anyone’s still here, but hopefully you’ve dialed into the RSS feed and are back, like us.

Dearest Golden State Warriors,

We love you. Really, we do. Since the dark days of Terry Teagle, we’ve been by your side, and truth be told, we’re probably never going to hop off the bandwagon.

But please don’t fuck up this year.

The Bay Area just wouldn’t be able to take it. You see, we’ve had quite a bit of suffering since you saw us last spring. When you got bounced from the playoffs in April—we’re sick of the Jazz too, by the way—the Bay Area sports scene was a totally different beast. The Giants were struggling a bit in the early going, but everyone thought it would just be a matter of time before Barry Zito got back on track and Barry Bonds broke the record. We had no idea how painful the baseball season would turn out.

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