People From LA Are Idiots

August 6, 2007

Yesterday’s edition of the LA Times contained one of the most stupefying stupid articles we’ve ever come across in a well-reputed, high-profile publication. The article, written by Kurt Streeter, basically expounds upon Baron Davis’ ties to Los Angeles, from his offseason charity games down south to his high school days at the ritzy Crossroads High in Santa Monica. But then, Streeter decides that the regal Los Angeles–not the plebian Oakland–deserves Baron.

It’s one thing to share an idea. It’s one thing to make a plea. Hell, even this blog has tossed around the idea of trading Baron during this offseason. But Streeter’s only reason is Los Angeles’ sense of entitlement. Here are some excerpts:

  • “But he doesn’t even play here. He plays in Oakland. And it’s not right. They don’t deserve him. We do.
  • “Everybody knows, after all, that Davis was a stud at UCLA before he became an NBA star in New Orleans, then was injured, barked at coaches, got traded, and came back to California, but to the wrong place. Oakland. He’s pure Los Angeles. Up in Oakland, you can’t even see his Aston Martin. Too much fog. They don’t have that kind of fog in Malibu.”
  • “Those [Dallas playoff] games up north looked like Lakers games during the best of times. Wall-to-wall crazies. The pixie dust had star-trekked north to watch their boy do his thing. In the wrong town. “
  • “That’s a pretty good description of an L.A. guy. Wasted in Oakland.”

Now, aside from the absolute lack of substantial rhetoric and the annoying repetition of sentence fragments (over)used for dramatic effect, what in the world makes Streeter even think that LA deserves Baron more than Oakland?

Let’s see here …

Angelenos are world-renowned for showing up late for games and leaving before the game is over. On the other hand, Warriors fans, despite having suffered through a dozen years of incompetence, are widely regarded as some of the most fiercely loyal (to a fault even) fans in the NBA, an opinion validated during the 2007 playoffs, when the Oracle became the loudest, most hostile homecourt advantage in the league. It’s entirely possible that the Warriors have one of the best fan bases in the entire league. And it’s made up of normal NBA enthusiasts, not people who go to the game just to be seen.

The Lakers deserve Baron? That franchise that houses Kobe Bryant, the most petulant, rape-y player in the league who has repeatedly demanded a trade? That franchise that decided to dump the most dominant player in league history because of in-house quarrels? That franchise that traded All-Star Caron Butler for All-Bust Kwame Brown? That franchise deserves Baron?

The Clippers deserve Baron? That franchise, under Elgin Baylor, that has repeatedly refused to pay for good players? At least the Warriors–despite their history of incompetence–don’t make decisions based on potential profit. That franchise that will always play second-fiddle to the Lakers? That franchise that doesn’t even have its own arena? That franchise whose biggest fan is the kid from Malcolm in the Middle? That franchise deserves Baron?

Los Angeles deserves Baron? The same city that booed both Barry Bonds and the Dodgers pitcher that walked him? The same city that vacated Dodger Stadium when Bonds left the game for a pinch-runner? That city deserves Baron?

Yeah, right.

Bring back the king [LA Times, via The FanHouse]


Rename Dodger Stadium, Win A Prize (Really)

August 2, 2007

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Attention all snarky, clever, halfway-intelligent, Dodger-hating Giants fans!

In a celebration of the arrival of Rajai Davis, SFist is currently holding a contest to rename Dodger Stadium:

In conjunction with the Black & Orange, we’re introducing our brand new contest, the Rename Dodger Stadium Contest. To win, all you have to do is come up with some spiffy new name for Chavez Ravine, like “Late Arrival Stadium” or “The Brett Tomko Launching Pad” or “the Field of Suck.” Well, our snark isn’t quite groovin’ today but you get what we mean.

Just post your ideas in the comment section and next week, we’ll announce a winner who’ll receive a Giants Gift Pack consisting of a hat and a pair of tickets. Our buddies at LAist will be doing the contest too and are asking asking Dodger fans to rename AT&T Park. Two words, then: Beat LA!

LAist is holding a similar contest for AT&T Park, so let’s not get outdone by those silly Angelenos. So, if you have any competitive spirit, are an aspiring NY Post headline writer or just like making fun of the Dodgers, submit your, um, submissions. And please, resist the temptation to just suggest “shithole.” That was our first idea too.

Because we believe in Say Hey readers, here are some preliminary ideas to get the ball a-rollin’ and the juices a-flowin’:

  • The ShitBowl: See what we did there?
  • The Swirladium: in honor of Tommy Lasorda’s fondness for hookers doing “the swirly move.” (Other Lasorda possibilities: Fatso Field, Slim Fast Field)
  • The House That Beach Balls Built
  • Alyssa Milano’s STD Pit
  • Chan Ho Park
  • Buy Nine Innings, Stay For Four! Field
  • Grady Little’s House of Horrors
  • The Bridegroom Grounds: The Dodgers were named the Bridegrooms from 1888-95
  • Angel Stadium Back-up Plan
  • Delino DeShields Diamond
  • Johnny Roseboro’s Bump
  • Frank McCourt Real Estate Endeavor #534
  • Scully’s Sleep Clinic


New SFist Giants Contest [SFist]

J-Rich Not Happy With Mully And Co. Right Now

July 5, 2007’s a tough racket, that NBA.

In his first public comments since the big draft day trade that sent him to Charlotte, Jason Richardson said he felt hurt, betrayed and sad about the news. And we feel for him. From what he says, it seems like the Warriors didn’t do right by him, and considering J-Rich’s classy, loyal persona, it must’ve taken a lot for him to publicly indict his former employers. Richardson said that despite the swirling rumors surrounding him, Mully told him that they wouldn’t trade him:

Ideally, Richardson said he would’ve liked to have his agent and Mullin work together to send Richardson to a place he’d like to play, just as Minnesota is doing for Kevin Garnett. But Mullin, Richardson said, remained steadfast in his stance that Richardson wouldn’t be traded, that the Warriors were building around him.

So when Richardson got wind from his agent, who learned from a reporter, that he was Charlotte, N.C.-bound, and Mullin wouldn’t answer either of their calls, Richardson said he felt betrayed.

Other interesting tidbits (are there any other types of tidbits?) from the article include the revelation that J-Rich privately asked Mully to trade him prior to the 2006 campaign and the fact that J-Rich was so hurt by the trade that he screened calls from his mother and Michael Jordan.

Our take: on one hand, that’s the business J-Rich is in and he still gets paid healthily for it. On the other hand, it does seem like Mully and company screwed him. At least J-Rich finds himself in a good situation, on an up-and-coming team that will be able to compete in the East fairly soon. He’ll be healthy, the primary scoring option and will be able to dunk on poor Adam Morrison during every practice.

As much as we like the trade (for money purposes, KG purposes and Brandan Wright upside), it pretty much seems inevitable that the W’s will miss Jason. Perhaps there will be some karma involved and the Warriors find themselves in desperate need of a shooting guard. Perhaps someone will get hurt and Monta Ellis will have some legal trouble or something (For no real reason, we have a bad feeling that Monta will find himself in the middle of a bad situation. Just a feeling. No basis whatsoever.). Even more so, J-Rich was the heart and soul of the team. Maybe Stephen Jackson can pick up the slack. Maybe Baron can. Maybe Marco Belinelli will. We shall see. But we fear the wrath of karma.

J-Rich emotionally spent [Contra Costa Times]

15 College Basketball Players We Strongly Dislike

March 15, 2007

In response to this guy’s very nice list of hated college basketball players, we decided to make our own list of the young men whose presence on the hardwood has profoundly affected our own lives in negative fashions. So, without much ado, here’s our list. Who did we miss?


15. Ray Jackson, Michigan: He gets a little bit of a hall pass because he was a member of the Fab Five, but he was the only one not to make it to the NBA. Totally coasted. Freeloader. Plus that Michigan team was solely responsible for the phasing out of John Stockton shorts.


14. Taylor Coppenrath, Vermont: It’s usually unusual (huh?) for a basketball player to be considered pretentious. Coppenrath was the epitome of New England snobbery. We’re pretty sure that after the game, he slipped into some searsuckers and a pair of loafers and boarded a private jet to his family’s place on Nantucket. If that’s not enough for you, check out his website. There’s still room at Coppenrath Camp! Hurry and sign up!

The rest after the jump …

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